No, its not me, its you !

Someone once told me that if I wanted to never end up in the convicts territory, I should always use the above to shift the blame. But can I use that for being absent from blogging for so long ? I really doubt, but let me still give it a shot, and you tell me if that was good enough -

10 reasons why I didn't blog for so long
1) [edit 1] - this point has been removed by the author. the author realised that he gave away a lot about himself in this point, stuff that had no reason to be known at this juncture. given lucrative incentive, the author is ready to think about letting out the truth to a selective audience.
2) [edit 2] - the author thought that he was too spiteful in this point. although that might be the truth, the author finds no reason to demonstrate it. the author has also learnt the lesson that he should revise his text before publishing. but please note that the author suffers from short term and long term memory loss from time to time.
3) the weather in singapore was so hot for the last month or so, that my AC wasnt good enough to keep my laptop cool. the machine crashed each time i opened blogger.
4) mozilla firefox touched a million downloads (or was it more ?) recently, and now the spammers have shifted focus from IE to Firefox. Everytime I opened blogger to write, popups popped up from no where to kill my concentration. how did you expect me to write ?
5) i got excited and jubiliant when India emphatically won the cricket series against SL - and I shaked my LCD laptop screen so hard ( as if it were a Wipro Little Genius desktop monitor ).......now I can barely see anything....only the occasional consonants and the few good pics show up. Arent Compaq laptops fragile ?
6) I went to a college alumni get together where there was free booze, and I came back home "all high", wrote such filthy stuff on this weblog that the Google DB threw up a InsertNotAllowed Exception. They mailed me and banned me (as a punishment) from blogging for all this time. I got back my rights today. Why are my alumni so rich that they can afford free booze ?
7) I proposed to the beautiful French madamoiselle next door, and in an highly unexpected scenario - she denied to accept my love...i cried and cried for the last month or so...I am ok now, but I still carry a big pack of tissues with me. I blame her for all the pain and the resulting absence from the blogging world.
8) I saw the movie "Before Sunset" and its prequel "Before Sunrise" a combined 25 times. Why do people make movies which eat so much of my time, and not leave me enough time to blog ?
9) I sprained my leg while sleeping [ this is as true as the news that Mallika Sherawat let it all drop off for the charismatic Jackie Chan to admire, when shooting a scene for "The Myth" ]. i know it needs extraordinary talent to achieve such feats - but a sprained leg didnt allow me to sit on the white-chair-turned-black. How could I write a blog when not sitting on my chair ? I plan to sue my bed.
10) I shifted to a new seat at office. This seat gives me a panoramic view of the whole room. I spend 6 hrs 32 mins each day observing what the 50 odd people in my room do. 4 hrs and 21 mins are devoted to the beautiful ladies. I work for 1 hr and 28 mins - and get paid for 8 hours. Where is the time to blog ? I blame the seat, the manager who shifted me to the new seat, the ladies who dress beautifully, and the other weird comic people.

Need I say more ?